Skip to main content

Color Outside the Lines

I used to breathe in toxic fumes of pollution that turned vapors of hope into smoke screens of despair on the regular.

I allowed others to hand me their broken, blue crayons to paint my sunshine of reality.

Each shade of blue created an unexplainable urgency for freedom, but the bittersweet tonic of opinions forced its way down my throat till my insides burned.

The voices emptied my womb and suffocated my space. Fibroid tumors oozed with air pockets of doubt that stifled my perplexed creativity.

Routine.
Repetition.
Regular vexes my spirit.

Why can't we walk on the moon of our own thoughts without judgement?

Why can't we dance in the rain without umbrellas of scrutiny?

Why can't we skinny dip in the Osun River without being swallowed up by a tsunami of gossip?

NEWS FLASH:

We can.
We should.
Color outside the lines of limitations.

To break up the monotony in our little animated space, I always try to create spontaneous mental exercises for my grandson to stretch his boundaries outside the norms of video games and cell phones. He does morning mediations with me on a yoga mat on the weekends. We listen to Classical Music (still a work in progress). I have him draw me pictures of something interesting he's learned & teach it to me.

WHY?

I am planting seeds for him to think outside the box.
I am watering seeds to nurture a King (leader).
I am watching him bloom wherever his heart is planted.

This is what his "waiting on breakfast time" looked like the last time he was here. He colored a quick picture of three pink Apple watches. My first thought--why would he give me something I already had? His explanation: He gave me three Apple watches cause I'm ALWAYS rushing & he wanted to give me time for school, work, and him! The lump in my throat bought a load of conviction. Not only is he watching, but he is paying attention to all the details.

Color outside the lines with the people that God lends you. Not only does it set you free from the superficial demands of daily realities, but it cultivates real life purpose: LOVE.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Glass Ceiling of Fear

"You can't "prop up" a person that refuses to stand ."-me Recently, I asked one of my " homeboys " to read a few of my blog posts and help " plug the gap " where my feet often stumbled. He didn't read one, but he read all of them! After a gut-wrenching, " throat punch of truth ," he unleashed the dragon. I was knee-deep in the swamp of hot ashes. Needless to say, I had allowed fear to become my glass ceiling ! Each time, I took off running for the hills , I looked back to the valley for "familiar hands." The " child within " had learned to go without the things needed most; so as an adult, I counseled my fears. I nursed my vulnerabilities. I coached my failures. However, my hands kept reaching for the " mentor within " that the younger version of me survived without. Let's face it! Kids learn what they live, even inherited dysfunction. Grown-up habits can resurf...
Post a Comment
Read more

Get Out The Way

It takes an incredible “act of faith” to step out on the unknown, but that’s exactly what God did—pushed me right out of the nest. I extended my stay, way beyond the appointed time. My wings were ready, but I secretly clipped them,  so I could remain still. I’d been comfortably nested for years, while focused on the “lack of my own hands,” but failed to trust the real provider. I was so keyed in on my inabilities that I refused to take the first step. It was just too scary! What if I failed? Never once realized, that I was equipped to succeed! I’ve always known my life purpose was tied to the ministry of “ service ,” but I failed to develop that hidden potential. I was afraid of rejection . I was afraid to be seen or even heard. I didn’t like attention because it came with an army or critics, including the biggest one within . How would I ever help anyone, if I refused to help myself?  I ran into a former high school classmate at the gym. We briefly talked ab...
Post a Comment
Read more

Becoming

One of the hardest truths to face is--being in a space that no longer serves you . Recently, I made a long, overdue decision to " disconnect " from the social media platform, Facebook. It seemed useless to work diligently to produce in a space that refused to acknowledge my efforts as a noticeable contribution. Showing up as a creative, in a world that pretends not to see you, reaffirms the wounds of " unhealed trauma " that remains undergirded by the scars of rejection. The " lack of engagement " sustained unwelcomed insecurities and prematurely wilted the petals of potential from forming full blooms. It reinforced the concrete walls of abandonment that lined the cracks of subconscious childhood memories.  It forced me into the isolated corners of desperation, trying to remain relevant in times of emotional uncertainty. My distress seemed oblivious to the masses that were drowning in their own pain. Help was like foreign aid, unattainable, beca...
Post a Comment
Read more